Let Go Of That Balloon

You could tell that a kid will surely cry if you took away his beautiful balloon or the kid accidentally let it slipped off his little hands. It’s like love; such a beautiful feeling yet there will come a time that you will have to let go of it or it will go away from you...Yes you would cry and the tears it will give you will be more painful than that of a kid losing his balloon..

We walked into this life, seeing how love blossomed into wonderful garden of fragrant flowers, a fine weather during the spring morning or that summer day, a carnival of fun and excitement. Then we could see love like a raging storm in the dark clouded sky, a starless evening sky, a cold blew of the wind. All of the feelings that love brought me, letting go of that balloon was always the hardest part..

I was always in love with the wrong guy or my love always got me wrong. I do fell in love but I really haven’t got a single boyfriend. Mine was a secret love, waiting to be revealed and at last I did with Turon (let’s give him that alias..)..The first one was kept secret but with Turon I finally let it out in the open and in short he knew it. Still, it was really painful to have a love that would never really bounce back or floats like the balloon. In short Turon didn’t love me back..

Love really made me out of my way; doing everything just to make Turon see me, hear me and feel me but love always made me realized that it’s no luck for me. Still, sometimes; as love was always unpredictable, I’d find myself still hoping and dreaming that one day this love i have for him would come true though we were already far from each other. I already drained my eyes from my tears of hopelessness...

Every waking day was just a change of everything, I learned that I really need to let go; but I know deep inside I don’t know how… I got the balloon, it attracted me so much and i haven’t let it slip off my eager hands. Then my balloon was slowly losing its air without even having the taste of floating freely up the sky. It’s slowly shattering my dream of getting a hold of it and still not losing the beauty i was attracted to.

Sometimes I hate when love doesn’t work for me like I have always dreamed of or day dreamed of. Then as they say there’s no rule that every love you give it must be reciprocated. In time you really have to let go and I need the feeling i have for Turon to be set free and let him go..It would never be a hard thing for his part for he’s just flattered all along...(Or maybe not for i’m not pretty enough for him.) But for me it would be the hardest part of all. Stop myself from holding on for there’s nothing to be holding me still...

The balloon was slowly slipping off from my hand but I was still holding on tight to the end of its string..Yup! I’m still hopeful (or hopeless...) But then I know god would help me make it through and my balloon would finally be set free and float freely in the air. I would finally let go of the balloon which was my love for Turon all along..

(Re-posting. Originally posted September 21, 2006)